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Breaking Points

>> Wednesday, May 26, 2010

What doesn't brake you only makes you stronger, right?!? I'm chanting this in my head, over and over again. What doesn't break me, will make me us stronger.

The night that I met my Mr., I knew that I was going to marry him. He literally swept me off my feet. We dated for almost three years before we got married. We had our battles over money and LSU, but overall we had a solid relationship - and a solid foundation to build on.

We fell in love, we got married, next up on the list was to have a baby. Little did we know the strain this would put on our marriage. However, we didn't let infertility break us. It definitely made us stronger. We came together, maybe even more so than before.

As straining and fragile as infertility made us, there was no preparation for what parenthood would be like. Especially after the honeymoon phase of falling in love with your newborn is over. The books don't tell you when the real sleep deprivation kicks in and your hormones are ragging, just how tough maintaining your marriage is.

The things you say in the middle of the night to each other between the wails of a screaming newborn are some of the meanest and most hurtful things. But, we made it through those nights - and have learned to function on a lot less sleep and hold our tongue. Those nights didn't break us, and they certainly made me stronger. We had a weekly date with a marriage counselor for a while just to be sure!

I'm in a constant battle to not let anything break us. And, the breaking points are constantly knocking on the door. Between Mr. transitioning into his new job, fights over to do lists, and a dying grandmother - the knocks are trying to beat down my door. I know that we will overcome this phase and be stronger on the other side. I know we will.

What doesn't brake us can only make us stronger! Please say it with me:)
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9 comments:

JJ.Kristy.Braylon.Jaxten.Taytum May 26, 2010 at 2:44 PM  

I love this post. It's so true and so real. I love your honesty. I'm chanting with you girl.

Carly May 26, 2010 at 3:04 PM  

I totally relate to what you are saying in this post. Nobody tells you how much strain becoming parents puts on your marriage. It's one of those things you aren't suppossed to talk about or be allowed to admit outloud even though EVERYBODY goes through it. At least I know my husband and I are. It's hard to find time and the ENERGY to spend couple time together. I'm chanting with you it will make us stronger! ;)

By the way, I'm from the D-list blog party. Really like your blog.
Carly
www.WordyOwl.blogspot.com

Ashley May 26, 2010 at 3:33 PM  

it is so true, and things that you didnt think would even be obtacles are constant struggles, you are I are so alike in we need to be in control and I think that is the hardest when it is things totally out of your control.

This to shall pass... repeat after me... ;)

Lisa May 26, 2010 at 3:44 PM  

Yes...it does make us stronger!! and these trying times always teach us a little something too.. hang in there girl!

Lee Anne Holman May 26, 2010 at 4:04 PM  

Man did I need to hear that there are other ppl out there working on themselves and their marriages. The hubs and I did in 6 months what most do over a few years... marriage, baby, bought a house and a new job. It has been stressful but with constant work and a short memory we are falling more in love and know with each other and our family everyday. New follower thanks to the d-list. Can't wait to read more =)

www.edwinjamesholman.blogspot.com

Amber May 26, 2010 at 7:25 PM  

Amen to this! Sorry to say that the strain on my marriage after we brought our son home from the hospital was never mentioned in any of those cutesy maternity books! I am convinced that any marriage that can survive the first three years, parenthood and raising a child together...can survive almost anything! Kudos to you for being honest and sharing what marriage is really all about. It's not always romantic dinners, wine and perfect memories. My husband and I have to work hard at keeping our marriage a happy one. I hope things get better for you real soon. Keep on keeping on! :)

Amy May 26, 2010 at 8:16 PM  

oh you got it on the nose!!! We never fought until we had Brady.

Lindsey May 27, 2010 at 7:42 AM  

Hang in there - thinking about you!

Jennifer May 27, 2010 at 4:29 PM  

Very well said. We are all going through those same things and it is nice to know others are as stressed out as we are. Kids to put a strain on your marriage, but it is because you fell in love, that you have kids... and we all have to remember that.

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